Injury to insult

There are some advantages to being a teetotaller. I am less likely to, say, strike out angrily when a guy bumps into me in a bar. I am less likely to start crying for no apparent reason in public. And I am less likely to stagger down the street into oncoming traffic.

Of course, when I say something or do something that's embarrassing, it seems that it might sting a bit more because I can't blame alcohol for my idiocy and/or clumsiness.

Last night I was walking around Seattle, looking for a bar that a friend had mentioned, and it was off of a main street. It wasn't, like, down an alley or anything, but it wasn't as well lit as the primary avenues I'm more used to traveling. I knew that the bar was supposed to be on the block, but I didn't see a sign for it and so I kinda went back and forth a couple of times.

Unfortunately, I got a little too close to the edge of the sidewalk. Specifically, I managed to step into a recess where a tree was planted (and the cement ended), rolling my right ankle and sending me sprawling to the ground.

I remember once in college I was walking along an icy sidewalk and I slipped badly on a metal grate, ending up on my butt (and learning to avoid metal grates in freezing conditions). I remember, too, a couple of years ago I slipped on my back porch steps and fell on my tailbone. I also remember a few times in my life where I've sprained my ankles playing basketball, a couple of those times resulting with me unable to walk for a few days.

But generally I'm not a clumsy guy (at least not physically... emotionally and intellectually might be different stories). I'm not used to falling down so my face is actually touching the pavement. I'm used to looking around to see if anyone managed to catch my terrifically embarrassing display, but it's not usually because I've fallen down.

The good news is that nobody saw me take my spill and that my ankle wasn't that badly sprained... I was able to walk it off and waste the rest of the evening in various futile efforts in spite of my injury.

The bad news is that my shirt got ripped. I evidently hit left elbow first, because I have a quarter-sized scrape on that arm and a significant tear in the fabric of a shirt that I actually like(d) quite a bit. The other bad news is that this morning I am able to move my right foot about 2 inches, it is swollen and purple, and I didn't foresee this sort of thing so I don't have any ice in my apartment.

I wonder what's next, really...