Dee to the Eye to the Vee to the Oh to the Are to the Sea to the Eee!

Divorced.

MySpace, in its infinite wisdom and its infinite inflexibity, seems to make me choose my "Status". I suppose that's so people can advertise their availability... although if people are forced to reveal something they wouldn't do voluntarily, it seems likely that they would just lie about it. But whatever.

I'm not, strictly speaking, divorced. I've been separated for about 2.5 months. The papers have been filed. The marriage is over.

Initially, I had my status as "Married"... because I am married. But that didn't really seem to be in the spirit of the thing, since while I'm not exactly out there dating people (or even necessarily interested in it at the moment), I'm much, much closer to divorced than married in terms of both my current situation and the foreseeable future.

The alternative, I suppose, would be to put "Single". I'm sure that dozens of hotties have already been turned off by my divorced status... my beautiful closed eye avatar pic (hailed by a recent review in The New Yorker as "... a shot across the bow of MySpace conventional wisdom") pulls 'em in, and my divorced status pushes 'em away. Or something.

But while I'm not strictly divorced, I'm going to be divorced. Probably for a considerable amount of time. I'm not proud of the fact, I never saw myself as a divorce candidate, and I don't think it's going to be easy to live with. There is a bit of a stigma there (here) and that's probably good for society, because a wealth of stable (even if imperfect) relationships is almost certainly good for society.

With all of that said: I can't be embarrassed. My (ex-) wife is a great person and I miss her every day, but neither of us have anything to be ashamed of. It just didn't work.

So am I embracing my (soon-to-be-) divorced status? Hellz, no. But I'm not acting like my marriage didn't happen.

It is what it is.