Pillow Talk

I like sleeping.

I have a deliciously comfortable bed and ridiculously high threadcount sheets. I also have a great memory foam pillow.

This is not enough, though. For whatever reason, I tend to sleep with a second pillow over my face.

About a year ago, I decided to replace my secondary pillow. I went to Bed Bath & Beyond to find a new pillow, and while I didn't know exactly what I wanted, I knew that one adjective was necessary: fluffy.

I don't like flat pillows. I don't like pillows that are stuffed with feathers or something artificial to resemble feathers. I want my pillows puffy and robust.

When I got to BB&B, it turned out that there was a sale on pillows... which was great. Since I didn't know exactly what I wanted, I knew I could look for the best value and snap that one up.

Unfortunately, I was not only generally indifferent, I was utterly ignorant. How does one find the best value? I didn't know which types of stuffing would last the longest, and I don't have allergies so I didn't need to buy hypoallergenic (in fact, if there were hyperallergenic options, I might have purchased one just as a challenge). Further, pretty much every pillow starts off pretty damn puffy.

I narrowed it down to two options. The first was a pillow that was normally like $40 and it was on sale for $25 (amounts approximate; it was a year ago). The second was a fancy-dan hypoallergenic pillow that was on sale for $40, rather than its normal $80.

Percentage-wise, the more expensive one was a better deal. But was it worth an extra $15?

I decided to do what any overeducated, gainfully employed single guy who often uses a secondary pillow and occasionally has guests that need to use a pillow: I bought both.

When I got home I popped open the wrapping on each and put on pillow cases and forgot which was which. For the first couple of months, I literally could not tell the difference. They were both fluffy, puffy, and robust.

Last week, though? I noticed that one pillow was still doing great. The other one was starting to bunch up and was overall much less fluffy, puffy, and robust. At some point, the quality difference actually showed through (big shock, huh?)

I'm not sure which is which, but I have strong suspicions that the more expensive one has lasted longer. I currently plan on kidnapping a homeless person with terrible allergies and forcing them to sleep with one pillow... if the allergies clear up, then it's the expensive one. There's nothing wrong with that plan, right?

Interestingly, at least to me, this morning I was thinking about my pillows and I was thinking about how latent deficiencies can lie dormant for months and even years before they come to light. As is my want, I considered how this might apply to friendships and other relationships.

I haven't had many "best friends" in my life. Through college, almost all of my best friends were from high school, and even though some people were added to the close friend list, I maintained contact with the key guys from high school that I was close to. Over time, of course, we've drifted apart and I've lost touch with some of them, and on a day-to-day basis I've grown closer to other people.

I've never been in a position, though, where I've looked at a friend and been confused by why we're friends. I've never "broken up" with a friend... with one glaring exception. I guess I've never "broken up" with a person that was just a friend.

And yet I know this happens. I talked to a person I know a couple months ago and she and another friend of mine had "broken up". They had been best friends since fifth grade and then... they decided they weren't going to hang out and that their friendship wasn't worth working on. I'm sure there are lots of details that I do not have and I'm not saying what they did was wrong.

It just must be an odd feeling to have a friendship that seemed so fluffy, puffy and robust suddenly feel flat and in need of replacement.