From the Mind Vault

Sometimes I have something happen to me that is worthy (in my estimation) of a blog, but I don't get around to writing it, or I wimp out due to the subject matter.

Well, this happened to me some months ago, and I was 50/50 on writing a blog about it... and I never did. I feel it's a story that needs to be told, and given the chances of me going to Mexico next month and never coming back, I might as well let it all hang out... Ed O's Blog style.

Or something.

So here it is.

I was in Safeway the other day, buying a few things. I see the same people pretty much every time I check out, but the checkers see so many people I'm not shocked that they don't remember me. I'm reminded of the saying, "You have a lot of clients as a lawyer, but your client only has you as a lawyer" and so I hold no ill will.

Going through the express lane, I noticed there was a new woman, and we had this exchange:

(Ring up hot dog buns) Beep
(Ring up gallon of milk) Beep
(Ring up pack of gum) Beep
Checker: Do you want to keep this outside of the bag?
Me: No, I'm good.
Checker: OK.
(Ring up can of energy drink) Beep
Checker: Do you want to keep this outside of the bag?

Me: No, I'm good.

Checker: OK.

(Ring up box of condoms) Beep

Checker: Do you want to keep this outside of the bag?
Me: No, I'm good.
Checker: OK.
(Ring up box of condoms) Beep
Me: I'd like to keep those outside of the bag.
Checker: What?
Me: Nothing.

Now, buying condoms is not like buying toilet paper. One involves a signal of accomplishment (or at least aspiration) while the other seems... not. Even I, though, who rarely shy away from my selection and purchase of birth control, could not be so brazen in my joking. Maybe someday.